Friday, September 13, 2013

Bugs & Signs

Hey boo,

How's it going?  I'm feeling pretty meh... There are a lot of little things I have to do now, that I really hate doing.

For example, checking the mail... ugh... You know how I feel about that!  Basically, the mailbox is a bug-infested place that scares the bejeepers out of me!  Usually, when my sister stops by, she will check it for me.  But then I am always left wondering if she "shook the mail out" to make sure no "situations" got inside... When I check the mail, I touch it like it's a contaminated piece of nuclear waste or something, just barely holding on to a corner with only my thumb and 1 finger...  And then I have to physically separate each piece of mail and shake it, to make sure that it enters the house bug free.  But I still often forget to even check the mail.  Sometimes a few days will go by and I will realize I haven't seen any mail in a while...

Then, there is closing the garage.  I have no idea why I hate this.  I think because it's kind of scary to open the door to push the button when it is dark out, and you never know who/what could be hiding in the garage.  I was also scared there might be a bug on the button... :-P  So now Jeff has installed a button on the inside of the house!  It's actually pretty neat.  And he installed a peep hole on the door leading into the garage.  I've already had to use it once, when the Griffen Pest Solution guy came.  (Geez, there is a lot about bugs in the email today...)

Well, since I keep talking about bugs, I guess I'll just continue with that theme...

I am warning you, if you are ever trying to send me "something" to say Hi or check on me or whatever, DO NOT SEND ANY TYPE OF BUG!  I will freak out and run away.  I may even attempt to kill the bug if necessary.  I will scar the children with this behavior, and they will become scared of bugs too (I'm pretty sure I've already done that though).

I would think you would know already not to do this, but maybe you'd think it would be funny, who knows???  Remember when I would have a nightmare where I would kick my legs all over and scream.  You'd wake me up and say "Babe, wake up, you're nightmaring..."  And the next morning I'd tell you the dream was about a bug on me, or many bugs getting me, basically, something to do with bugs.

Or what about the time when Will was only a week or 2 old, and he woke up in the middle of the night.  You were downstairs changing him, and I was at the top of the stairs and couldn't come down to feed him because there was a spider hanging from the ceiling that I would have to walk under.  I won't even face a bug to feed my crying baby!

So clearly, sending a bug is a bad idea.  I repeat, NO BUGS!

I'd also like to add NO RODENTS and NO SNAKES.  (But I don't think you'd send either of those since you are scared of them too... but just in case...)

While we're talking about sending me a "sign" or whatever, try to make whatever you send EXTREMELY OBVIOUS!  First, you know how unobservant I am.  Remember when I look in the pantry or the fridge for something, and it will just be on a shelf not directly in front of my face, and I wouldn't see it.  Remember how you would have to "stage" the pantry and fridge to make sure I saw particular things.  Yeah, I don't notice things or find things very easily, so it needs to be pretty obvious and right in front of my face.

Second, I don't want to always wonder, "hmmmm, was that rainbow from you"  or "was that hummingbird from you".  I know the science behind these things.  If the sun is at an angle and it is raining, there's probably going to be a rainbow.  Maybe if that rainbow appeared in the middle of the night, or at high noon, or when there was absolutely no precipitation anywhere,or if I was the only one who could see it, then I might think it was from you.  And again, hummingbirds are migrating south right now... so if it was in the middle of winter, then maybe...

So the moral of the story is, if you're going to say "Hi" somehow, you should probably just write a note and leave it on the counter, on top of my computer, or on top of a Diet Coke.  Then I'd be sure to find it and read it.  Anything else, and there are no guarantees!

Anyways, I'm rambling, because it's Friday night, and I have nobody to do nothing with.

I miss you.


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