Trendsetter

Hey Boo,

How's it going?  I'm just the usual...

So, there is another word that is making me bonkers lately.  "Old."  Ugh... It is like nails on a chalkboard to me.  Or like the sound of a dentist drill.  It's almost like it physically hurts me every time I hear it.

Ok, so you know that nobody pissed and moaned about turning 30 more than me.  All I did was complain about it!  You know that I got so worked up/freaked out about it that I literally threw up.  That I cried more than once in the days leading up to and after my big 3-0.  I hated turning 30.  I thought I was SO old!  Old. Old. Old!

And you would tease me about it all the time.  I was "robbing the cradle" because you were the whopping 5 months younger than me.  You loved pointing out the fact that I was in an entirely different "decade" than you were.  There was a "3" at the beginning of my age and you still had a "2."  On a survey, I would now have to choose the 30-34 age range, while you were still in the 25-29 age range.  Oh, how you loved to point out how old I was.

Well, guess what?  One of the final gifts you gave me is making me feel YOUNG!  I have realized how incredibly young I am (we are).  Young! Young! Young!  Seriously, we are not even half way through our life yet.  I just looked it up and the average life expectancy in the US is 76 for males and 81 for females!  We still have a long way to go.  A  l o n g way!  So, as I have said many times before, it's pretty much BS that you got screwed out of 46+ years of life.  That I got screwed out of 46+ years with you by my side.  That our kids got screwed out of 46+ years with their daddy.  BS.

So, I understand why people say they are old.  I used to say it all the time too.  Because we don't act like we're 16, 18, 21 anymore...

And I know that nobody near me is saying it on purpose, to make me crazy.  It's a common expression that LOTS of people say.  Nobody is trying to mean.  I can tell that there are certain words that people say, and then realize what they've said when I'm around, and kind of pause awkwardly before continuing on with their story.  It's not a big deal.  You and I used to say things like that all the time!  One of our favorite expressions was "Lay on the floor and die!"  You would ask me, "What would you do if you saw a spider?"  And I would say "I would lay on the floor and die!"  Or when you would explain to me one of the girls reactions to getting dropped off at daycare "She laid on the floor and died."  Well, that expression has pretty much been eliminated from my vocabulary, although occasionally something happens and I think it, but then I catch myself and don't say it, because it would be IA, and of course nobody but you would understand it anyways.

But from now on, I've decided that we shouldn't say we are old.  Because we are not. We are young!  The reason we don't act 16, 18, 21 anymore, is because we are "grown ups!"  We don't wear skirts where our @$$es hang out because we have learned through experience that it doesn't really look good.  We don't stay out late because we have learned through experience that we will pay the price the next day.  We have jobs, we have kids, we have spouses, we have responsibilities.  We act responsible!  We act like grown ups!

So, I am going to start new trends to get rid of calling ourselves old. When I feel like cashing in and going home at 9pm, instead of saying, "Blah, I am so OLD," I'm going to say, "Blah, I'm such a grown up!"  When I talk with my friends about kids and insurance policies instead of cute boys and how wasted we got last night, I'm going to say "Blah, I'm so responsible!"  Or when we talk about how we can no longer do a back-handspring, our bones crack when we get out of bed, or that we were just prescribed bifocals, I'm going to say "Blah, time is really taking it's toll on my body!"  (Yeah, I know the last one is extra dorky, but whatevs...)

We are grown-ups.  We are responsible.  And of course our bodies have experienced a little wear and tear.  But we are  F A R  from old.  I've decided that the only people allowed to say they are "old" are males 76 and older, or females 81 and older.  They can be considered old because they have outlived the average American.  They can BRAG about being old.  They should be PROUD to be old.  Because with everything that can go wrong, they are pretty much awesome that they made it to that age.  They can show off their wrinkles, gray hair, and hip replacements with pride.  High five, Grandma, you are rockin' that cane and hunched over look!

So anyways, that's just me complaining more about another word that I've learned to hate... Apparently I've got a lot of hate going on lately... blah...

Well, I guess that's it for now.  I pretty much miss you like crazy. Cuh-ray-zee!

Hearts!