Wednesday, March 26, 2014

My Life is Sh!tty... Literally!

Hey boo,

How's it going?  Oh, you know, my world is all about sh!t these days...

Seriously, I feel like poop is almost at the top of my list for things that I think about/deal with/talk about/worry about.  No joke.

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First, there's Violet's whole constipation thing... Ugh, watching her go through this is shear torture to me.  I literally have tears in my eyes when she is finally pooping because it is such a struggle for her.  There are times where she is crying because she's pooping.  Other times, I can just see her pushing so hard, and she does this weird little gasp thing because she's holding her breath while pushing.  For real, if I'm nowhere near her, for example, she's in her crib about to go to nappy, but I hear that gasp sound, I know that she's pooping and that she will be crying for me any second.

I am trying to be supportive to her, so I sit right by her while she is going, and now I even hold her hand.  She even asks me to hold her hand when she is finally going to go poop.  I continue to reassure her that it's OK to go poopoo, and she should try to go poopoo every day so that it doesn't give her "owie." Any time she poops, it's like a huge celebration while I'm changing her diaper.  I'm all happy and excited and high-fiving her, no matter how disgusting it smells or looks or that it got all over the floor or whatever, because I want her to know that pooping  is a good thing!

The pediatrician had me change her diet.  I might have mentioned that to you before.  I cut down on her diary consumption, and increased fruits, like berries.  They also told me to start giving her fiber gummies.  I think that has all helped a little bit, but not enough.  I am going to call them again, because I think we might need to give her miralax or something.

So yeah, that's just me worrying about poop!
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Along those same lines, I feel like I'm always talking to Violet's teachers at daycare about poop.  Letting them know that she hasn't pooped in a while, so try giving her apple juice. Asking if she pooped today?  And if she did, what did it look like?  Did she cry during it?  How much was there?

Poop, poop, poop!

 I even made up a catchy little song to the Bagel Bites commercial tune all about poop.  Will was my inspiration, as I was changing him for what seemed like the millionth time one day...

"Poop in the morning!  Poop in the evening! Poop at supper time!  When you poopoo in a diaper, you can go poopoo anytime!"

I know, I'm so creative... Here's the Bagel Bites commercial I was talking about...



Speaking of Will... I feel like the majority of his poopy diapers end up being blow-outs!  How does this kid produce so much poop!?!?!?  Lately, when he wakes up from nap, I walk in to find his crib covered in poop because it all came out the back of his diaper.  And he is doing that awesome thing where he fights through every diaper change, so poop is smearing everywhere.  And he tries to grab his junk, which has poop on it, and I'm just like, AH! Don't touch!

This morning, he was up around 6:30am, but I didn't get him right away, because it's a work day so I was getting myself ready.  And he wasn't crying or even fussing.  I could just hear him "singing" and "talking" in his crib.

As soon as I open the door to his room... Whoa!  The smell hits me!  And then I see that he has poop (like water-poop) all over his crib sheets and his jammies!  What!?!?  I bring him to the changing table, and start stripping off his jammies, and it is just everywhere.  I did my best to wipe up what I could, and then I had to give him spa because it was just EVERYWHERE!  Ugh, on a work day!?!?!  We are already running late!  I just had to leave the girls at the kitchen table eating their cheerios while I put him in the bathtub and scrubbed him off...

And I left his crib mess for me to clean up when we got home... mmm, nummy... :-P

Hey, guess what?  Poop.

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Everyone had poopy diapers this evening after dinner too.  Which is great, because that means Violet pooped.  But it was just A LOT of poopy diapers to change, right in a row.  And plus I had to clean up Will's crib.  So tonight was pretty sh!tty!

So yeah, I've already felt like the world took a big sh!t on my life, figuratively.  And then I deal with sh!t all day, literally.

Oh well... maybe someday I'll tell the kids about your goal to poop at every Meijer store's bathroom.  It's a great thing for our bucket list, right?  :-)

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POOP!

Ok, that's it.  Lovebuckets!

Oh, Update/PS - I was re-reading this just now, and remember how I emailed you about speaking "Fluent Sarah" a few weeks ago?  Well, I totally forgot about the word we used to say all the time: "Poop-a-loop!"  Like, I'd tell you that somebody pooped today, and you'd say "Poop-a-loop?"  Or I'd start changing a diaper, and I'd be like "Ah, you have poop-a-loop!"  I don't know, we were weird.  But I loved our weirdness...  Missing you...

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